How many times does a child need to be told they are naughty?
Helping curious kids turn naughty moments into creative learning
When my nephew was around 14 months old, like all toddlers, he would drive us all crazy by emptying out the kitchen cupboards. His antics never occurred to me as anything extraordinary, until I had to explain to his grandma, who’s in her late 70s, that he was not being “naughty” but “curious.” Being a prolific cook, she can always be found in the kitchen; naturally, he was curious as to what she was up to and wanted to copy her!
What’s in the cupboard ?
To give him an outlet, we cleared out a small low-level kitchen drawer, and filled it with his own kitchen utensils; rolling pins, plastic cups and saucers, spoons and all sorts. It took a different set of skills to pull a drawer open compared to the ease of opening a cupboard, but he mastered it in no time.
Once he had his drawer of toy utensils accessible, he could get busy every time grandma did. Taking things out of the drawer, putting things back in, bashing on saucepans and shaking empty salt and pepper shakers - all good stuff! Grandma was satisfied too, soon realising that she needed to replace the word ‘naughty’ with the word ‘curious’. Keeping children curious and interested is a skill, and it promotes learning.
I am not the only one who thinks along these lines. Maria Montessori believed children are naturally eager for knowledge and capable of initiating learning in a supportive, thoughtfully prepared learning environment. Nurturing a child’s curiosity is a journey as parents (and grandparents) we should all go on. It will yield dividends when they are much older and need to self-initiate things to keep themselves busy.
“Learning is not just something children do at school!”
Quick crafts - with no fuss !
At the time of writing, we are experiencing a lockdown due to Covid-19, so keeping children busy, and encouraging their ability to use their imagination, is critical. Children can go into their world and be imaginative; creative play can be hours and hours of fun. I think for primary school children, the best place to start is making things. So, I went on a hunt and found the most spectacular book, called “Quick Crafts For Parents Who Think They Hate Craft” by Emma Scott-Child.
This book shows you how to be creative using everyday household items. My personal favourite craft was fashioning a superhero mask and cape, fit for a teddy bear, from a sock, a pair of scissors and felt tip pen. Another fun craft was a cardboard-and-wrapping paper sword, perfect for jousting, swashbuckling or defending a castle.
Children can spend many hours creating stories with these crafts, and enjoy the satisfaction of making it. An entire pantheon can be made from your toy cupboard, legends can be spun from cardboard! A single act of creativity paves the way for the lessons learned through imaginative play. The excitement of a makeshift tent is so much more than an old scarf over two chairs. It is a huge adventure. And with it comes the opportunity to learn about what things inspire your child.
Setting the scene for self-initiated play
Play: Helps children learn
What makes your child light up? Think about it. Watching your child and seeing what they like is the first step. One of my students, aged 6, loved playing with his Lego superhero characters. He brought his Lego characters to every therapy session, clutching them tightly in his hand. At the start of our therapy, I would ask him to prise open his hand and put the characters on the window sill where they would be safe – we agreed to dismantle them, and they could be part of a game we played together. Every successful piece of work meant he could return to his characters to assemble one piece at a time.
Trust goes both ways
As caregivers we must learn from our children and nurture a bond of cooperation. It does not matter what age or ability, the trust must develop. There are rules and parameters of accepted behaviour for both adults and children. It is not about manipulation but mutual benefit.
“A journey which fostered a bond of trust and mutual respect.”
Grandma learned to enjoy my nephew’s creative play. She would ask him what he was making in his kitchen, and it was the start of a journey which fostered a bond of trust and mutual respect.
Dyslexia? Dyspraxia? ADHD? ASD? Speech & Language? Developmental Delay? Anxiety?
Is every school day a struggle? As a parent, you may feel exhausted and on this journey alone. Each year you see the gap getting wider. You need to do something - change the approach, help your child learn for themselves, find a way to turn this around - to help while you can - do this NOW. the first step is free.
